Feelin' Seedy...

...Or "A good bun is hard to find."

I've expressed my disdain in the past for brioche burger buns, mostly because people get thrown off about the quality of a burger if it's wedged between two shiny pieces of bread. But the fact of the matter is: a burger's bun can really make or break the burger sometimes.

For example, this burger from Farmer's Cabinet:

Looks totally great right? The bun felt really soft and tasted buttery - which overwhelmed the taste of the burger, so it was kind of disappointing. (I felt like I was getting the Paula Deen special.) Plus, even though it was flavored like butter, it was definitely not as smooth as butter. The bun's buttery softness actually made it a little dry and crumbly, and the burger wasn't juicy enough to even it out. Even with the amount of ketchup I tried putting on it, I felt like it was hard to swallow at times.

Example #2: One Mile House's Bowery Burger

Photo credit: Bridges, Burgers & Beer

The bun was just your basic, supermarket-style hamburger bun. Plus, the burger-to-bun ratio was totally off here. Bet you can guess what happened when I picked it up to eat it. It promptly began to fall apart in my hands - especially after adding ketchup and burger juices flowing. A bad boy burger like this needs some backup. You can't just throw it on a whimpy potato roll! (Especially since it's loaded down with all those toppings.)

But the Parliament Burger at Pub & Kitchen gets it right:

Good burger-to-bun ratio, gets everything nestled under there nicely, plus the adorable pickles on top. It was a sturdy bun, it looked good and it tasted delicious. It didn't add or take anything away from the burger itself; it was the perfect compliment. (And did I mention how cute it looks!?)

However, sometimes great buns happen to not-so-great burgers:

Photo credit: Bridges, Burgers & Beer

Oh yeah, I want you inside me.

Here's that trick I was telling you about: Using a sexy looking bun to reel  you in and trick you, while secretly disguising a less than stellar patty underneath.

Photo credit: Bridges, Burgers & Beer

It's like the morning after the bar and you wake up next to someone realizing you had total beer goggles on the night before. Look how small that burger is compared to the bun! Not to say the burger itself wasn't tasty. But I was eating a lot of bread most of the time when I was wishing I was biting into a delicious, juicy patty. (Industry Burger - The Industry, Philadelphia)

Let's recap: A good bun should be - firm yet soft, stand up to anything you pile on top of it, be willing to take in anything that's thrown it's way, never overwhelm, look cute, taste delicious and go down easy. (FYI, these are the same things I look for in a relationship.Hey-o!)

Philly's Best Burger? Part 2: Good Dog

Much fanfare had been given on the Internet about the burgers at Good Dog, a bar located on 15th street between Walnut and Locust, especially in regards to their Good Dog burger which comes stuffed with Roquefort cheese.

I opted for their traditional burger, prepared medium - which is how I ask for all my burgers. Medium gives you just the right amount of pink for it to be juicy, but not still mooing. I came during the lunch hour on a Friday, so it was full but not packed and I sat at the bar. And waited. And waited. When I was at the point of gnawing my arm off I was so hungry, my burger finally arrived on - SURPRISE! - a brioche bun! (But that was on the menu so I guess I already expected that. Plus, I could tell by everyone else getting served their food before me.) Their fries came with a side of their housemade aioli for dipping. It was kind of like a watery version of the onion ring sauce at Burger King.

I prepared to dive into this delicious burger, my palate poised to receive the succulent, juicy meat. But, lo and behold after first bite, I realized not only was my burger not even the slightest bit of pink in the middle (it was hard to tell at first in the dim lighting of the bar), but it was dry, overcooked and charred - lettuce, tomato and ketchup used as an attempt to cover up the grill marks. I was starving so there was no way I was sending it back at this point and so, I trudged on and chewed through the meat like a dog chewing on rawhide. I was extremely disappointed. No flavor, just the taste of burnt beef in my mouth. And let's not even get into the brioche bun being used yet again in a completely unoriginal attempt to fancy-ify this overpriced bar burger. ($11?? Seriously??)

Regardless of how busy your kitchen is, the least you can do is try to prepare food to your customer's request. I can only imagine what would have happened if I ordered a steak there (if they even serve steak; I have no clue.) Or if I had some kind of food allergy. (I actually think I did have some allergic reaction to whatever was in their aioli after I left. I've never known myself to have food allergies before, but my throat felt like it was closing up and made it hard to swallow.) I guess they just figured it was better to overcook my burger then undercook it, and that does not a good burger make. Bad dog, very bad dog. My rating: "D".